Digital Detox

We love our technology! Despite this, it can have harmful and devastating effects to both adults and children. With this in mind, I would like to suggest for individuals and their families to participate in a Digital Detox.

Statistics reveal that the average child spends up to six hours of their day in front of a screen. Of course, the availability of technology (as well as possessing the skills to use it) is essential in our digital world as most things from everyday work to education is dependent on it. However, digital addiction is a great problem for kids who may experience side-effects such as depression, low self-esteem, insomnia, and a poor academic performance. With the increased usage of digital devices, there has been a significant decline in the time children spend with their family and friends. Additionally, the effects are visible in a lack of development in communication skills that are vital for future career paths.

Participating in a digital detox provides a way for families to “Disconnect to Reconnect.” Of course, that’s not to say that technology should be completely banned – merely regulated. Until we create some important family boundaries regarding screen-time, we will squander our time with limited face-to-face, meaningful connections.

Don and Carrie Cole penned, Screen Time: From Tuning In to Turning Towards. They provide the following ideas about intentionally disconnecting from technology in an effort to experience family connection.

Have a weekly family meeting.
Schedule a weekly family meeting to set screen time limits that seem fair to everyone. And use the meetings to evaluate how those agreements are working out.

Allow everyone to weigh in on the conversation.
While it is the parents’ responsibility to ultimately set the limits, children often respond best when they have a voice in the conversation about what is important to them.

Agree on some simple things.
Begin small and perhaps agree to have some time when everyone is to be without phones or screens, such as family dinner. 

Make memories as a family.
Plan weekend activities that are interactive and fun for everyone.

Use social media to connect with each other.
Technology doesn’t need to be the enemy of connection. Try sending family group text messages as a way of connecting or share links of interesting/funny videos or social media posts.

Be kind to each other.
If there’s a conflict regarding the screen time plan, take a deep breath, be kind to each other, and begin again—without criticism, defensiveness, or contempt. Sometimes it takes a few attempts to work out a compromise, so be patient with each other through this process.

Validate your child’s feelings
If a time limit is agreed upon and your child goes into meltdown or rage when the time limit has been reached, validate their feelings. “You seem (angry or disappointed) about the screen time limit. Tell me what’s upsetting you.” If they respond by saying that this is unfair, then suggest that they bring it up at the next family meeting. If they agreed to it during the first family meeting remind them of this. Then ask, “Since this is the way it is right now, what would you like to do instead?” Empathize but don’t back down. Make sure that the consequences of that behavior have been discussed ahead of time.

Technology is here to stay, so find ways to incorporate and use it to enhance your family relationships. In addition, recognize the potential for isolation and distancing that technology presents so you can take steps to avoid those traps.

Take the lead in finding the balance between tuning in to screens and turning towards each other.